Visualizzazione post con etichetta studi scientifici. Mostra tutti i post
Visualizzazione post con etichetta studi scientifici. Mostra tutti i post

lunedì 28 dicembre 2020

Vaccino anti-covid: la ricetta segreta

Vaccino anti-covid: quale la ricetta?
Eh niente ah, visto che tuti domanda, noi semo andai a far la ricerca de quala xe sta ricetta segreta del vaccino anti-covid.
Oviamente no gavemo domandado ai centri de ricerca/università perchè xe tropo impegnai drio monade, noi se semo rivolti ale istituzioni serie: l'Università dele nagane, che sicome no gaveva voia de lavorar se ga rivolto al'Università dei furlani, che ga lavorado soto atenta osservazion (cole man drio la schena) del'Università dei Veci.

Ma sicome el responso ne pareva ancora tropo serio e sopratuto soto alto ris'cio coruzione concussione complotista dei poteri forti che per futizar i risultati ghe ga promesso:

-  ale nagane el 5G per vardar meo i pornazi;
- ai furlani le scie chimiche per coltivar meo le panoce; 
- ai veci el mercurio nele vene che ga efeto viagra

alora ala fine se semo rivolti al'unico vero istituto atendibile incorutibile: l'Università dela strada, soto l'atento sguardo inquisitore dei scerifi de feisbuk.

Eco quindi la ricetta del vaccino anti covid:

70% brinjevec - principio attivo
10% lasko pivo - favorissi la diuresi e l'eliminazion dele tossine
10% union pivo - par condicio per evitar pupoli con la lasko
5% teran - colorante
5% cren tritado - vanzava spazio nela riceta e i lo ga zontado cussì, no se sa mai, meti un mal de note.
10% maieta dela salute tritada

Sì, savemo, fa el 110%, ma al'Università dela strada za i xe dotori, epidemiologi, comissari tecnici, architeti struturisti, curazologi e jebemtologi, no i pol miga esser anca matematici dei.  

Bon desso che savè el segreto no steghe dir a nissun per via che i ga dito che xe quele robe che fin che xe segrete funziona e invece co sa tuti va a remengo!

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venerdì 20 novembre 2020

Il parco del mare di Trieste: il vero progetto

A volte ritornano.
E' stato presentato oggi il progetto del Parco del Mare con svariate novità.
Ma noi da buoni triestini legati alle robe vece, ricordiamo il vero progetto che avevamo elaborato ben dieci anni fa nel Tre Volte Monon Behavior, che ritorna di colpo d'attualità. Rigorosamente in inglese perchè xe internescional :)

Park Quell: the Triestin Sea Park Project

“Sea Park will be, that we will not be”



The Comitate for the Sea Park of Triest is trying to make this Park from 2004, just after the failure of the candidation of the city to the Expo 2008. Some anonymous informators told us that the participation to the Expo was lost because of the too original theme proposed by Triest, that was: Expo' Nosepo'. The idea was to keep all the stands closed except the stand of the triestin products. But in this stand, the organizators would have put some triestin commessas expert of Volentiering (Manna, 2009a), in order to spread to the world the culture of “no tegnimo”, “quel che gavemo xe là, basta zercar”, “seremo tra zinque minuti, la torni doman” “no i fa più” and “la provi in Friul”. However, this great idea did not encounter the positive reaction of the giudicant commission and Triest was excluded by the Expo.

Now the project of the Sea Park is having some difficulties and various possible locations have been scartated: nosepol at Barcola for the inquinament, nosepol at the ortofruitticol market because it has to go to the Noghere but nosepol for the inquinament, nosepol at Goby's Holy Mary (Santa Maria del Guato) because se pol, but nosepol, but no se sa, but there is no bori and who have not bori have not remission.

Smarronated by all this difficulties, the Comitate for the Sea Park of Triest asked us to develop an unattackable project, and here it is.


The name must be accattivant, not scontated and greatly related to the culture of the city. For these reasons we propose the name Park Quell. As can be easily noticed, the name is inspired on the famous Parc Guell, the masterpiece of Antoni Gaudì in Barcelona. We are trying to contact him so he could realize some pieces of the Park, but for now he did not answered to the phone, bel muss. If he will not collaborate, che'l se tachi, we will give the job to Toni Raudì, a patock artist cressuted launching raudi in Borgo San Sergio.


As it could be easily seen in fig. Faclan, the Gulf of Triest, from Piran to Grado, has exactly the shape of a clanfa (Zuppa, personal communication). 

Fig. Faclan. The Gulf of Trieste fits
perfectly the shape of a clanfa

So, our great intuition was to make a giantastic supercosmic structure that covers all the coastal zone, from Piran to Grado, the greatest clanfa-building of all times. However, the local administrators told us that this project had a too high tax of sboronery, so we reduced it as follows:

Our idea is to utilize all the Barcolan Riviera, from the Earthfull (the Terrapien, dei) to the Miramare Castle. The Castle, in particular, will be pushed into the sea and will became an underwater attraction from which windows the visitors will enjoy the fantastic marine life, with the guatos, the zievolees and the sea stronzs in the sand.

The ICTP will be absolutely inglobated and involved in our project. Thanks to its great research potentiality, it will became the natural headquarter for the study on the clanfa endemism, and will be renominated in “Institute for the Clanfa Taconeti Proselytism”.

As we are respectful for the local traditions, we will leave the topoleenee 7 and 8 as they are now, and will declare them National Protected Clanfa Area. In all the other zones new buildings will be constructed for the Sea Park.

We have already all the permissions to build everywhere, but there is a small group of rebels that are organizing a sit-in in order to be not rusped away. This evil resistance is composed by some vecionis that are protecting the old lavre court in Barcola Pineta. We promised them a new beautiful technological lavre court with radio-controlled electric lavres, liofilizated spritzets and holographic scostumated mulettes (the famous holo-gran-phic technology), but they answered that they do no want, that nosepol, that nogascopo and that nosegamaifato. So the sit-in is still going on. However, we do not know if they are still sentaded for their rebellious protest or, more probably, because they are no more able to stand up without help. Probably, after a week of sit-in, they have gone in sweet (i xe andai in dolce dei) and have forgotten the reasons of the protest and are simply playing cards on their tavolinets. 

Inquinament and bonificas

The Earthfull of Barcola is inquinated with diossine and must be bonificated before the construction of the Sea Park. We investigated about the problem of the inquinament and found that a lot of people are preoccupated that in the future there will be fish with 3 eyes, giant trees with legs or super-intelligent four-headed folps that will conquer the world.

So, in order to tranquilizate all, we will bonificate the entire area. We will trucidate all the things that are alive near the Earthfull of Barcola, so we will be sure that there will not be problems of terrifying mutants. Neither the smallest dna molecule will survive! The final bonifica.

Zacheghesemo, to improve our budget, we will use our bonificated Earthfull also as a discarick for the nuclear wastes of all Europe, in particular for the future nuclear plant of Monfalcon. This because we are for the “Kilometer zero” culture: the nuclear wastes will not travel too much and will not inquinate our precious world.


The city of Triest has a very small number of parking, so this could be a problem for the accessibility of our Park Quell. We have two important proposts to solve the problem:

make system with the future “Barcola-Monte Grisa Funivy”, so people can leave the car to Monte Grisa and then come to our Park with the Funivy.

the second propost is our favorite and is more easily realizable: when our fantastic Sea Park will be completed, with all the Aquariums, Theaters, Cinemas, Museums, daily events and other marvelous things, the city of Triest will not need the real sea anymore, because no one will have it pel cool. So, we will put a great boutade of cement in all the Gulf (except the Barcolan Riviera, obviously) and there will be a giant parking for everybody, the new Parksi “Park Sea”.


The great structures of the Sea Park will be perfect to organize events and manifestations every day. In particular, we will give hospitality to the next Clanfa Olympiads, and we will elaborate a new regolament with a more objective system of evaluation of the tuffs. The tuffs will be performed in the vasc of the guatos and the winner will be the clanfador that will make jump out of the water the highest number of guatos with his schizzs. As triestins are great clanfadores, maybe we will use the vasc of the dogfish.

Furthermore, we will also give hospitality to the next Barcolana regates. Obviously in the same vasc of the guatos, just to break them the maroones again. So the Barcolana will became an indoor regate and there will be no more problems of too strong wind, too strong sun, too strong rain, zima de cagars indoss, snow and too cold water. Some might say that an indoor regate is impossible because there is no wind, but this is a stoopedade because we do not need the wind: the crew of each ship will sufiar autonomament on his sails and po' bon.


The education of the new generations is fundamental for the future respect of nature, so we developed some didactic programs for children.

One of our best activity is focused on the alimentar pyramid, with practical demonstration: the children will see a fish that magnates an alga, a fish that magnates other fish and the same fish that is magnated by other bigger fish. Finally, at the last stage, the children will experiment if at the top of the pyramid there is the man or the dogfish: the most fastidious muleto will be launched in the vasc of the dogfish and the entire classroom will learn with their own eyes if the dogfish magnates the muleto or if the muleto magnates the dogfish.

Another important activity is focused on the inquinament. We will give a lot of money to the Ferriera and to the Gas Intestinal Rigassificator because their collaboration is very important for the practical demonstration of our didactic programs. Every morning they will emit all their spuzzs and toxic sporcugnes in our sea in order to show to the children the effects of the inquinament. We are planning to increase their sporcugn potentiality in order to make the demonstration more impressive. Again, the most fastidious muleto (actually the second most fastidious, as the first has been magnated by the dogfish) will be launched in the inquinated sea, so the classroom will see in an amusing new way how dangerous is the inquinament.


A Park with the controquei must have a Research Department famous in all the world. In particular, our Research Departement will be the first to give the final solution to the sad problem of extinction. The fish stock is decreasing and there are a lot of species that are sparinding every day. To eliminate this problem, our final solution is to eliminate these species una volta per tute and po' bon, remengo.

In this way there will be also a great risparm on the funds given to the research for the conservation of these species. As we will solve the problem, we think that at least the 99% of this money must be given to our Research Department, that will use it to develop new methodologies to send in remengo the eventual new species that will become at risk of extinction in the future.

When these species will know that now nobody have them pel cool, that nobody is trying to save them, and that addirittur somebody is trying to remengate them, they will surely cagate in their braghes and will do their best to be not at risk of extinction.

So, thanks to our genial plan, they will save them by themselves and the extinction will not be a future problem.


Animals of the Aquarium of the Sea Park

The idea of an Aquarium or a Zoo with the animals taken in their exhibits is old and obsolete. In a “normal” aquarium or zoo, the animals are alimented, cured, salvaguardated and cocolated a gratish. Sometimes they can even have sex a gratish! This is no more tolerable and not sustainable.

An animal, to be kept in our exhibit, must work, in order to pay all the services that the Park will give him (a clean exhibit, food, toys, natural enrichments and sex). If an animal does not want to work, he will be sent away at piadones in tel cool. So we develop a list of jobs for the animals of the Park Quell:

Bavosas: they will be the comics of the Park, and their favorite number will be the imitation of Luca Laurenti. When they will get old, their favorite number will become the imitation of the “vecio bavoso”.

Dolphins: they will participate yearly to the Olympiad of the Clanfa. We are sure that they have the perfect shape to schizar a casinaz. However, the dolphins will come yearly from Lussin only if they have voia, because we know very well that this sort of spectacles increases dramatically the hunting and killing of dolphins (The Cove, 2009). We hope also that balenas will come, because they are champions of bomba americana.

Swordfish: we have an important collaboration with Margherita Granbassi, that will teach them all the secrets of the art of the sword. After the addestrament, they will be ready to participate to our weekly sword tournaments. The swordfish that will be infilzated will be obviously cusinated in our restaurants or sold to the fish markets, so there will be no more need to fish the wild swordfish and we will save them from extinction.

Fig. Nosepa. The famous Nosepolpo.
Bilingual pupol by Vile&Vampi

Polpo: we are addestrating a folp like the famous german Polpo Paul, that always intivate the correct prevision of the football matches. Our Polpo, called the Polpo No-se-Paul, or Nosepolpo' for his friends, will be addestrated to give answer to a lot of important citadin questions (Fig. Nosepa).

Torpedo fish: these electric fish will be the natural renewable energy of the future. The Park Quell will be the first place where this new technology will be experimented, and all the energy of the park will be produced by the electric organs of our torpedoes. If a torpedo become old and its electric organ begin to malfunction, it will produce electricity in other sustainable ways, like running in great criceto's riodele connected with dynamos.

Abyssal fish: they will constitute the illumination system of the Sea Park. We are speaking about those very ugly fish with the lanterneen on the head. Obviously, it is very important that they do not illuminate themselves, because they could spavent the visitors with their mefistofelic ugliness. However, we will give them a psychotherapist to heal their autostime.  

Penguins: the penguins will be the cameriers of our restaurants. We tried to convinc them to make a more original job, like running in the criceto's riodele with their small zatines, but they told us that they have always worked as cameriers and they do not want to change their dresses.   

Pedocees: the pedocees, that par 'talian are called “cozzes”, will stay at the entrance of the park selling the tickets. As they are pedocious pedocees, we are quite sure that they will perform a lot of istrianisms (Manna, 2009b), so stoopeedades like 3x2, sconts, reduced tickets, family and group special prices will be eliminated for ever from our Sea Park.

Sea urchin, sea porcupine, sea riccios dei insoma: these small nice echinoderms will be used for a very important and fundamental job: they will be disposed in all the office screevanias as pen-keeper (portapenne, po'). In case of festins or rebechins, their aculeos will be very useful also as stecadents to grampar the parsut.

Sea little horses: they will be feeded with frico, jota and polenta in order to let them grow. When they will be circumcirca one meter tall, they will be placed in all our structures as children games. If it is not clear, we intend that type of games in which the children stay sentated on the game (typically a car or a horse), insert a coin and the game begins to move. We are now searching the part of the sea little horses where the coins will be inserted.

Cocals: they will be the security of the Park. The colony of cocai of the Pedocin has years and years of experience in making longhi bruti with all the old maranteegas in order to steal their lunch, so they are perfect for this job. 

Branzins and Orades: we tried to teach them a good mestier, but they were not good in anything. The only thing in which they resulted good is the pignat. So their primary occupation will be being magnated in our restaurants.

Sea stronzs: their passivity is invincible, so they will be used to replace the cevapceecees in our restaurants.

Scarpenas: some asked us if we have scarpenas. No, finide (Note digo).



Some of our animals will be part of our great “Sea Orchestreena”, that will play day and night some rivisitated triestin popular song like “La cavalucia marina zelante”, “el molo de Parenzo”, “mandeghe la lista al zievolo”, “ancora un litro de ribon” and “I love you tonni”.

The compontents of the orchestreena will be:

Turtles, that will play their strong panzas like tamboorees and percussions;

Vongoles, canestrels and capasantas, that will tictacate themselves like small naccheras;

Muricees, naridols and capalongas, that will play their shells like trumpets. We don't know if they will be the “fiati” or the “flati” section, because we are not sure through which part of their body they will suffs inside their trumpets.

Medusas and anemones, that will indrizz their tentacles like strings and will be the arpes and the arches of the orchestreena. We prefer the medusas, because the anemones, as you could easily imagine by their name, are not very smart.

Sepias, that will cure the special effects during the concerts, like the black smoke machines.


Military defense

As we live in bad times and there is a lot of loschee individuals in the world, a military defense system is necessary. Also, Triest in particular is a city full of nagane, bobane, tare, trapolers and genconi, so it is better to stay always in campane. Fortunately, we found that the sea of Miramare was the secret place where Tetsuya sconded Goldrake in his last mission (fig. Gold-One). So we stole it agrattish and reprogrammated it to become our Goldrache, mostro con le tirache, in permanent defense of the Park Quell. As its stronger secret weapon is the alabarda spaziale, it is perfect for the role of  hero of Triest.


Fig. Gold-One. Goldrache, mostro con le tirache.

Construction times

We think that it is very important that the entire construction of the Park Quell is done by furlans, that are very laborious and fast. When the job will be completed, we will study a method to cazarghela and to not pay them. Maybe we will close them in a didactic aquarium to teach the children the “effects of the sun mixed to sea water on furlans”.

If we will be able to find some furlans to build our Park, all the works will be finished in a couple of day. Instead, if we will not be successful and the works will be done by triestins, the Sea Park will be constructed with the calmeta between a spritz and another, and will be when we will not be, but viva l'A e po' bon dei.

 Note digo: if you have not understand this witz, search for “scarpena” in youtube ;)


Manna D. 2009a. Triestin language endemisms. Monon behavior Vol. 69 No. 90: 9-12. Bianca&Volta edizioni.

Manna D. 2009b. Spinazing, the triestin answer to the crisis. Monon behavior Ciu: 8-12.

The Cove. 2009. A documentary on the 23000 dolphins killed every year in Japan.

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venerdì 27 marzo 2020

The real origin of Coronavirus

Niente, in tuta sta scienza aplicada al coronavirus, no podeva mancar el studio del Monon Behavior Research Department sula vera origine del coronavirus. Per evitar pupoli e gomblotismi vari (no dovessi servir, ma no se sa mai), disemo subito che XE UNA MONADA, XE UN VIZ, NO XE VERO, XE PER RIDER, NO GA BASI SCIENTIFICHE, NO XE STADO PUBLICADO SU LEONARDO SU RAITRE :P

Diego Manna
Monon Behavior Research Department

We live in a period of great longhi, in which a lot of people is obligated to stay at home fancazzing. For a great number of triestins this is a dream that is just avveranding, but however comunq some syntoms of malcontent are coming out and a lot of people is searching the origins of coronavirus to give them sazie lignade. We investigate all this great scagazz in order to give an answer to this question.

Key words: Leonardo, Caro Cogoi, furlans, Conte, frico

We live in time of quarantene causated by the worldwide scagott for coronavirus (Conte, 2020). The first days were not so bad, spaving a lot, gratanding the balotoles and watching pornhub that was a gratis (Burlasconi, 2020). However, now, at the third week of reclusion, people begin to diventar cofe of staying home, inventing a lot of unuseful activities just to make something, like alenanding his dog to ciapar the coronavirus (Fig. 1).

Fig. 1. A dog that have ciapated a fake coronavirus
Also, people begin to search for the real origins of the coronavirus, reading a lot of sazie monade and bufales on the internet and cascanding to them as peragnocks (Salveenee, 2020).
The aim of this study is to give the final answer to preocupated people in order to:
1. understand who must be inbiavated;
2. understand when the quarantene will finish.

Material and method
To obtain our data, we decided to monitorate the situation in the streets of the desert city of Triest. However, even if we were in possess of the autocertificazion version 14 written on the carta de cul to give it more valor, a lot of people from the windows send us to remengo ziganding "stè casa", fotografanding us and metending us on the faceboog group "Diventa anche ti un scerifo de facebook", so we ciapated a vagonade of damer that even our golden reserve of carta de cul did not bastar (Iaspi, 2020) (Fig. 2).

Fig. 2. Facebook's sceriffs in action.

So, we decided to use the sbisiganding and cucanding on the social method, also known as making the cazzs of the other method, obviously focusing our attention on Triest because other cities we don't have pel cool and who key himself - chi se ciava.

As a first result, we found that people reacted in different ways to the quarantene.
At the iniz, people simply decided to not gaver too much pel cool and just wash their hands, eat more radic' and less looganighes (also because there are less looganighes than days), condir all the magnar with the kren and missiate all the bever with a bic' of brinjavec.
Then, with the increment of the CCSC (Caro Cogoi Semo Cagai) index, triestins became everyday more cagated and stufadizs. So they began to write more to Segnalazioni, to make longer tours with the dogs and to activament zercar more cantiers where they could scassate the marons to the workers. Then, when they noticed that there were everyday less workers in the cantiers and that the dogs of Triest were always all sad because the bar were closed (Lutazzi, 1957), they began to invent new occupations at home.
At first these occupations were innoque things like remenghing each other on facebook groups, making flashmobs from the windows like singing all together "La scoresa", or sbisighing with pornhub premium a gratis domandanding themselves what is the difference with normal pornhub: maybe the babes have bigger tetons.
Then, these occupations became everyday things very similar to new type of jobs, like social influencer in potato-strucker (strucapatate-pigiamone), oste of the osmizainpergolo (Fig. 3), first magazinier specialized in gestion of the carta de cool, contadin piantanding matavilz, youtuber ginnast with the panza and even artigian making fantasious quarantene temathic lavorets (Fig. 4).

Fig. 3. The osmiza in pergolo of Beatrice

Fig. 4. The artistic lavorets of the triestins ispired by the quarantene
Adiritur, some triestins are now saying that they want to get back to their normal work as soon as possible (promising that this time they will work per bon).
In pratic, with the increment of the CGSC index and the passar of the quarantene, the triestins loose their innate scazzo attitude and have a great impenade of the FRIUL (Furlan Ricercante Insaziabilmente Un Lavor) rate, that at great valors lead to a psycological disturb also known as FURLANITE (Codroipo, 1998).

We found a second important result in our microscopic analysis of the coronavirus. Nobody noticed it before, but the coronavirus is praticament identic to a frico (Fig. 5).

Fig. 5. The coronavirus (left) vs frico (right).

Somanding all our results and fazending 2+2, it seems clear that the coronavirus is a evil furlan creation, invented to increase the FRIUL rate of the triestins until they will be all ciapated by the FURLANITE and will begin to work as a furlan.
Probably something went wrong in the laboratory where the furlans were sbisiganding with this coronavirus, and someone sconfonded it with a frico, magnated it and diffused it in all the world.
The situation seems to be very longhi, as can be seen in this highly professional graphic.

If the Caro Cogoi Semo Cagai index continue increasing at the normal ritm, we will reach the FURLANITE on 13/4, pasqueta. 
It seems very important instead to sbassar the ritm of the CCSC index in order to sbassar also the curve of the FRIUL rate and normalizate the triestin scazz at a VDFSI (Voia De Far Saltime Indosso) level.

The coronavirus is clearly a furlan experiment gone to remengo from a laboratory in Friul. Now it is very important to stay calm and to regulate the Caro Cogoi Semo Cagai index in order to evitar of being ciapated by bad acute FURLANITE.
Triestins: just stay home and don't make a clinz.
And about the revenge on furlans... just think that also them must stay at home without working, one of the worst torture for a furlan.

Burlasconi S. 2020. Remengo Gheddafi, viva la Gafi. Better a durex than a dura lex ediction.
Codroipo D. 1998. Alore, vonde monadis.
Conte G. 2020. 50 sfumature di decreto.
Iaspi G. 2020. Runner de damer. The manual of the lofio from the window.
Lutazzi L. 1957. Solo davanti a un fiasco de vin quel fiol de un can fa le feste. Can de Trieste records.
Salveenee M. 2020. Papete cocktails menù: the Leonardo (mojito and corona beer). Food ricetts for influencer 49: 4-9

Furlan advisory: se scherza, ve volemo ben :)

 P.S. (parte seria): vista l’importanza di restare nelle proprie case e vista la concomitante chiusura delle scuole, abbiamo deciso di attivare, per chi lo volesse, la consegna a domicilio del gioco BARKOLANA, completo di espansione MATI PER BARKOLANA, al prezzo “d’emergenza” di 10 euro (il prezzo normale dei due giochi è di 30 euro), pagamento in contrassegno. Chi fosse interessato a riceverlo a domicilio scriva una mail a indicando l’indirizzo di consegna. Consegneremo tendenzialmente la mattina dopo. L’offerta è valida solo all’interno del Comune di Trieste. Attiva anche la consegna a domicilio di tutti gli altri libri. Trovate l'elenco completo qua.

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mercoledì 12 febbraio 2020

Esof 2020: scoperto l'atomo triestino

Il giorno della presentazione di Esof 2020, ecco che viene svelato uno dei più grandi misteri della scienza moderna: la reale struttura degli atomi.
Pare infatti che non dappertutto gli atomi rispettino la classica divisione in neutroni, protoni ed elettroni, ma che in certe parti del mondo queste particelle siano sostituite da robette endemiche che ne influenzano il comportamento.
L'approfondimento della scoperta ovviamente è rimandato al grande evento di luglio, ma per ora il Monon Behavior Research Department è riuscito a carpire un'anteprima grazie un ottimo lavoro di spionaggio accademico protocollato sotto il nome in codice "Rubar con l'ocio".

In soma dele some, pare proprio che Trieste sia una di queste eccezioni. Forse la più interessante.
Ecco la struttura degli atomi triestini:

Come (quasi) tutti si saranno accorti subito, manca una delle tre particelle classiche: l'elettrone. Quela che ghe cori intorno al nucleo come un mona, per capirse. L'atomo triestino è costituito da:
Proton, neutron e orcotron.
L'orcotron è molto più lento e scazzato del normale eletron. Compie un giro completo attorno al nucleo in ben 4 secondi, il tempo necessario a scandire la sacra formula "Cossa cori che te cori co no cori che te cori" (se accostate un potentissimo microfono a qualunque atomo triestino, scoprirete che in effetti questa frase è percepibile).
Da qui nasce la famosa indolenza, inoperosità e noxecoionismo dei triestini. 
No se pol far niente, gavemo proprio EL SCAZZO ATOMICO.
In zonta, il ricercatore triestino Fabrizio Cupardo ha anche trovato un isotopo radioattivo dell'Indio, il Codindio, che decade emettendo proprio orcotron ad altissima energia.

Va ben concludemo con la giusta reclàm, visto che se parla de scienza: el compendio triestin che no pol mancar nela vostra libreria xe oviamente The origin of Nosepolis! E sicome savemo che a causa del'orcotron nissun gaverà voia de andar zo in libreria a ciorlo (anche se saria meo), eco qua el link per ciorlo diretamente online. Tra l'altro ricordemo che Trieste xe diventada cità dela scienza solo grazie a questo importante studio :)

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venerdì 24 gennaio 2020

L'origine del capo in B: questione di equilibrio

Alora gnente ah, spulciando tra i soliti importantissimi studi scientifici VERI, eco che salta fora questo:

che in pratica dimostra, dopo astrusi calcoli e simulazioni, che se te camini col cafè in man xe facile che qualche ioza te caschi per tera.
Eco i modei analitici parafantachimerici diatronici svilupadi con grosso dispendio de mezi e tecnologia a suporto de questa coragiosa tesi:

E gnente. Sula base de ste inovative scoperte, ne par evidente che alora el capo in B, overo intel bicer invece che in tela tazina, probabilmente xe nato a Trieste per evitar de perder qualche ioza de cafè, visto che semo sparagnini.
E no saria meo bever sentadi invece che andar a spasso col cafè in man come lole?
Anche questo iera za stado scoperto dala sageza triestina, da cui el famoso modo de dir: meo un sentite che zento alzite (o anche: "mona, sentite, mona sentite!")

Bon, per finir, cioleve un cafetin e meteve leger el belissimo libro "Le disgrazie del tran de Opcina" (che tra l'altro in sti giorni el bagola in piaza Oberdan). E anche ogi gavemo messo un poca de reclam che no guasta hehe.

venerdì 19 aprile 2019

Porconare è indice di onestà, lo dice la scienza

Gnente, sai ne piasi scominziar i articoli con un bel "lo dice la scienza".
Insoma dele some ogi gavemo trovado sto papero scientifico:

in cui i muloni dimostra che ghe xe una corelazion positiva tra l'onestà e el tirar porconi. Podè legerlo tuto strucando sul titolo. Noi gavemo leto solo l'abstract e se fidemo.
Sto studio fa el paio con quel che dimostrava che tirar porconi rilassa.
Eh gnente, bela scoperta ara. Bastava far un salto oltre Isonzo.
I furlani, popolo efficiente, lavoratore e onesto, za saveva de secoli sta roba!
Ben bon, reclam finale: a proposito de "profanity", ricordeve che xe in libreria el belissimo manuale dela boba de Borgo!

mercoledì 3 aprile 2019

La tecnica MONA è il futuro: lo dice la scienza

Niente ah, su segnalazione di Michele Zazzara che su segnalazione di Daniele Stradi ci ha segnalato sto articolo, segnaliamo anche noi che:
finalmente anche la scienza ufficiale ha sdoganato la MONA TECHNIQUE come il futuro o presente di un qualcossa che no gavemo capido ben ma no ga importansa.
Qua la prova e il link, se volete leggere voi che sè più studiai ah.

Noi ci limitiamo semplicemente a dire che sta MONA TECHNIQUE non è niente di nuovo, era già ben conosciuta fin dall'antichità qua a Trieste come semplice soluzione a tutti i mali applicabile in ogni situazione di pericolo e riassumibile nella banale formula:


Abbiamo già dato istruzioni al nostro Dipartimento Legale per far causa agli scienziati che volevano brevettare questa Mona technique pensando de far i mone per no pagar el dazio. 
Ah! Ve xe andada mal!

Momento reclam finale: Ou! Ricordeve che xe pena vegnudo fora nele librerie più bobe el belissimo libro "Libero libera tutti". Lo presentemo martedi 16 aprile ale 17.30... da Libero po, in via della Risorta 7/a.
Opur podè passar sta domenica a trovarne al mercatin Barbacan Produce in Piaza Barbacan dale 10:00 ale 18:30. Gaveremo tuto con super sconti primavera: tuti i libri a 5 euri, Barkolana+Mati per Barkolana a 20 euri... festa! :)

giovedì 7 febbraio 2019

Nasar scorese fa ben ala salute

Va ben, come titolo xe un poco forte. Ma xe el risultato de un importante studio scientifico internazionale de cui ne par giusto dar notizia.

In questo importante paper dal respiro internazionale, el mulon disi che in pratica un componente presente nele scorese, l'acido solfidrico (o H2S o idrogeno solforato o solfuro di idrogeno o insoma come che volè, femo de desso in poi "Toio", che xe più facile) imboreza i mitocondri e li fa andar a tuto gas, portando più energia, visto che xe quel che i fa. E quindi fa ben un poco per tuto. 

Eco la dichiarazion uficiale del Dr. Mark Wood: “Although hydrogen sulfide is well known as a pungent, foul-smelling gas in rotten eggs and flatulence, it is naturally produced in the body and could in fact be a healthcare hero with significant implications for future therapies for a variety of diseases.”
Che tradota in triestin sona più o meno cussì:

"Anche se savemo che Toio ga sai tiro de nera e de ovi marzi, el xe una roba natural e chi che mola la scoresa el se libera de (più de) un mal".

A ocio ne par un clamoroso caso de plagio scientifico e semo za in causa per dimostrar che sta scoperta salvavita la gaveva za fata l'autor de la canzon "La scoresa", de cui riportemo parte del testo:

La scoresa la scoresa xe una roba natural
chi che mola la scoresa el se libera de un mal
ma per far la scoresa ghe vol ben tegnir el fià
perchè se no vien fora meza, resta in cul l'altra metà.

Bon, comunque desso me racomando co ve tien de scoresar in coriera no stè esser egoisti e tegnirvela per voi, ma fè del ben per el prossimo. 
Ricordeve: Un sorriso e una scoresa xe gratis e pol migliorar la giornata de tuti.

Ben bon, e a proposito de scienza mona, momento reclam: ricordeve che in libreria trovè "THE ORIGIN OF NOSEPOLIS", aka Monon Behavior 4, nele librerie più bobe nonchè comodamente online qua!
E tuti i misteri de Trieste, dala maledizion de Miramar al Nosepol, dal Quel che se ciama ala movida, dai cocai ale Lasko ve sarà finalmente riveladi!

lunedì 26 novembre 2018

Ai gati ghe piasi le scatole de carton

Niente, dopo lo studio sui gatti che no ga pel cul e il secondo studio sui gatti che no ga pel cul, oggi segnaliamo questo importante studio:

in cui i muloni dimostrano incontrovertibilmente, dopo studi e controstudi e attente osservazioni e analisi, che:
- Ai gati ghe piasi le scatole de carton.
- Se i ga scatole de carton, i xe meno stressai.

No so, forsi nissun se iera ancora acorto :P

Da tutta questa scienza applicata al gatto, possiamo dunque ricavare questa definizione definitiva di Felis gatibus nogopelculis:
"The cat is a ronfanting pet that likes a carton baul and that doesn't have pel cul"
Nel contributo video, Pampel gioca nel suo castello di cartone. Senza gaver pel cul.

Ben bon, a proposito de scienza mona, ricordeve che xe pena uscido "THE ORIGIN OF NOSEPOLIS", aka Monon Behavior 4, nele librerie più bobe nonchè comodamente online qua!
E tuti i misteri de Trieste, dala maledizion de Miramar al Nosepol, dal Quel che se ciama ala movida, dai cocai ale Lasko ve sarà finalmente riveladi!

martedì 24 aprile 2018

El gato capissi ma no ga pel cul

Oggi si torna alla ricerca etologica che conta: quela sui gati.
Dopo la dimostrazione che i gatti pensano che gli uomini siano come loro e che i gatti no ga pel cul i loro paroni, e dopo l'importante ricerca sul fatto che le pulisi dei cani salta più dele pulisi dei gati (1 metro e una scoreza vs 1 metro e una neocibalgina), oggi si chiude il cerchio della ricerca internazionale con questo studio:

Nel quale comparano la risposta di 20 gatti al richiamo di 3 sconosciuti seguito da quello del paron.
Atsuko Saito e Kazutaka Shinozuka (che xe i nomi dei studiosi e no dei gati) ottengono due risultati interessanti:
  1.  I gatti rispondono agli stimoli solo con un movimento delle orecchie o al massimo del muso. Tipo alla Germano Mosconi "Chi è che fa quel *** di rumore lì?"
  2. I gatti discriminano tra la voce di un mona qualsiasi e quella del mona per antonomasia (el paron). Solo che, appunto, no i ga pel cul comunque, e rispondono utilizzando el libro dele risposte triestine:

Da valutare la risposta dei gatti friulani. Probabilmente sarà sempre qualcosa di comparabile alle risposte di Germano Mosconi.

La tipica risposta entusiasta al richiamo del padrone di un gatto che no ga pel cul.

Nel documento video, la cagnolina Mačka non discrimina tra la sagoma e un gatto vero a causa dell'identica reazione che avrebbero i due alla sua voia de zogar.

P.S. A proposito de bestiuze: ricordeve del belissimo libro "Animali triestini e dove trovarli", filastrocche dedicade ai nostri animaletti e ai rioni dove trovarli.
In libreria opur qua :)

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