mercoledì 28 novembre 2018

La vera origine del NOSEPOL

Prima anteprima dal nuovissimo The origin of Nosepolis, capitolo conclusivo della saga Monon Behavior in cui tutti i segreti di Trieste verranno rivelati. Il libro si trova già nelle librerie e negozi di souvenir più boba di Trieste e dintorni, nonché online qua.
Presentazione ufficiale martedì 4 dicembre alle 18.30 al MushrooM Bar, in via San Maurizio 4/b.

E si parte quindi subito con uno dei misteri più antichi della città: dove nasce il NOSEPOL? C'è sempre stato? Keep all dear!

The real origin of Nosepol

Monon Behavior Research Department

Trieste is often indicated as the city of Nosepol. Nobody knows why nosepol, but everybody knows that efetivament nosepol. We indagated this negative attitude of the city in search of its ancient origins.

Key words: volentiering, nogascopo, nosegamaifato, Nosepolis, Paul Noseh

Nosepolism is a very well known characteristic of the city of Trieste. It consists in the fact that nosepol. Sometime it is so strong that it is very difficult, anzi, nosepol propio, saver why nosepol. Because nosepol, and basta.
Nosepolism has been studied by a lot of researchers (Zaflaucic, 1976), but the results were never publicated because nosepol. However, tracces of nosepolism have been found in long and larg in the history of Trieste, even in recent scaves that have revelated the shape of the city during the roman age (Fig. Vilevampi).
Fig. Vilevampi. The old giant NOSEPOL of Triest. 
This particular shape of the ancient Tergestum saved the culattes of the  tergesteenees behind hand (drio man), because when the barbarees, the longobards, the lanfurs, the quei and the queialtri tried to conquistar the city, they read “nosepol” za from lontan and so they molate the colp, because if nosepol then nosepol, pochi longhi.
Tergestum was defeated only when tergesteenees decided to make too much the bobazze building, vizin of  NOSEPOL, another giant dichiaration: MAGNENE LE CULATE. Napoleon, that was french and so very finoto, didn’t apreciate this, attacked Tergeste and made a big scagazz. As in his army there was also a big nagana called Remì, who made a lot of pupoli, from that time a big scagazz in Triest is called “Remì Tour”, or remitur (Dialetich. 1954).
Bon, all this introduction just to say that nosepolism is insite in triestins from centuries, so the aim of this study is to understand its origins and to evaluate if it’s possible to do something or if nosepol.

Material and methods
Searching for a method to analyze the nosepol, the first question we affrontated was if se pol studiar the nosepol.
It is a sort of biss that eat its tail, because if se pol than it’s not true that nosepol so our study subject was inesistent and our job finished. But, as we wanted to ciapar the scheis of our research, we ragionated for absurd and dichiarated that se pol studiar the nosepol.
So, we used the first person scoionament nosepol ciaping testanding how many nosepol we could ciapate in one month, and we categorizated them.

From our scazanting experience, we found that nosepolism is well spread in the city with various forms, that we elencate here from the most gentle to the most ranzid:

This is the softest form of nosepolism. Volentieri is an educated nosepol, a nosepol missiated with scontrosa grazia.

Another soft nosepol. Educatament it gives you a geographic alternative.

Similar to laprovinfriul, but in this case the alternative is stagional. However, probably also in the other stagions it will not be stagion. And also there are no more the half stagions, so it’s very longhi.

Kind nosepol mixed with modern solution.

Again a soft nosepol, with a pratic alternative.

Soft and positive nosepol that stabiliss that the richiest in effect could be useful. But however nosepol.

Sort of friendly premonition, to make you sparagnar fadiga. Because the nosepol is in agguate, and if you begin to zercar, it will reach you and you will butar your time. Take a spritz instead.

Similar to gnancazercar, but without the friendly advice. Key yourself, ciavite, insoma.

Even worst than noesisti. What you need exists, but it is a thing totally inutil that nobody use or ga pel cool. So: nosepol and you are mona.

Classic and most diffused negation of possibilities. It doesn’t need a reason. Remengo Obama’s “Yes we can”, the answer is nosepol!

Nosepol clearly motivated with scarse fiduce on your abilities. Obviously it’s not important if in reality you are the best in the world in doing that thing, because there is always at least a 0,001% of possibilities that you will fail. So, pitosto che failar mal, meo no far.

Nostalgic nosepol. In a sibylline way it attest that now se podessi, but it’s better not poder because sestavameocosestavapezo.

Again a nostalgic nosepol, but without the sibylline riferiment. In this case it is clear that nosepol, in the past, now and forever, otherwise qualchidun gavessi za fato.

More powerful than nosegamaifato because basated on an active bad experience. It introduce the next and most powerful nosepol with this logical deduction:
Once se fazeva → No andava → Now no i fa più →  NOGASCOPO

The supreme one, it ridiculize the nosepol. Infact, it is based on the idea that it is not important if se pol or nosepol, because even if se podessi, nogascopo.

As you can see, the city of Trieste is oberated by nosepolism, so tanton that there is a proposal to change her name in NOSEPOLIS (Tanze, personal communication).
This richness in nosepol forms and the historic testimoniances made us think that the origin of nosepolism must be very very antic.
In particular, we hypothize that there must have been a traumatic event in the oldissim Trieste that decretate this big change in people’s attitude. A terrible thing like a big-bang, or a big-s’ciop, or a tsunami, or a deeluvio, or the meteorite for the dinosaurs, or Gigi D’alessio for the music.
Fig. Voio. Voio’s grave. By Erika Ronchin
We are nearly sure that this dramatic event was the Death of Voio, a casinaz of years ago.
After his death, when people asked for something, the answer became always “Voio is dead. He is dead in guera, with the mudand in tera.” (fig. Voio). This answer is clearly a form of Nosepol. An educative Nosepol for fioi that soon began the brain lavagg of triestins’ minds.
Then, but pochi sa, after some years also his sister Voleria died. And also his brother Volessi. Only one member of the family survived: his cousin Volentieri. Which, as we wrote in the results, is a soft form of Nosepol. So, things degenerated rapidament and the Nosepol soon enlarge his influence to all the city of Trieste, spreading in all its different forms.
However, other researchers think that these are all monades and that all the nosepol begins after the second world war, when in Trieste arrived the aleati (and also the cats were gobs) (Gobon, 1945).
In the allied office of “thing to do”, where all the triestin citizens used to portar their requests for the reconstruction, there was an impiegat called Paul Noseh. He put his firma on all the requests with a smile, but the triestins, not very able with languages, simply read always “Noseh Paul”, thinking it means Nosepol (they were also incazated because they thought “Ciò ma cossa ga de rider sto mona a dirne nosepol, ma el ne ciol pel cul?”). From that day the nosepol became unstoppable, even after the death of Paul Noseh (Hesser & D’arseh, 2013)

Nosepolism and Trieste seems to be an inscindible binomio, and the origin of this attitude resulted to be very ancient.
Nothing can be done to solve the situation, because if you try to impose a positive “se pol”, it will be soon annichilited by the nosepol, just following this simple commutative dimonstraction:
Sepol Nosepol = Se pol non poder, quindi Nosepol.
Nosepol Sepol = Nosepol poder, quindi Nosepol.
So, the only thing that we propose is to incentivate the use of the softest forms of nosepol, like volentieri.
We propose to be fully finanziated to open the Volentieri High School. Obligatory school book: el libro dele risposte triestine (Praselj, 2017).
However, it is clear that all this study no gaveva scopo.

We don’t ringraziate nissun because maybe we could dismentigar someone who then will incazzar himself for this ringraziaments fati mal, so: pitosto che far mal, meo no far.

Dialetich G. 1954. Etimologie del zoca. Monade Edizioni.
Gobon F. 1945. Gob your sea gob your father gob your sister’s pussy it was gob even that it was gob even that. The Gobons 3.
Hesser P. & D’Arseh P. 2013. 50 sfumature of Paul. Keep Paul Deer edictions.
Praselj A. 2017. El libro dele risposte triestine. Bora.La
Zaflaucic F. 1976. Nosepol: nosepol saver. Nosepol ediction

2 commenti:

  1. Dead Diego Manna, I'm a fun of your lavor (in the sense that me diverto).
    I have a suggeriment for your study of the origin of Nosepol.
    You don't have considerated the expression "voio no posso", but I think that has a great historic value! Maybe it could be an intermediate stage before the death of voio...reflect!
    Thank and congratulescions for your sempre apprezieted research in monade.
    Paola de Roian

    1. ciò, it's true!
      Voio no posso must be something that happened just some day before the death of Voio... casin! :D


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