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martedì 11 dicembre 2018

Scontrosa grazia dei vecioni de Trieste: come sopravvivere

Opalà! E dopo l'anteprima completa sul NOSEPOL dal nuovo bellissimo libro The origin of Nosepolis che si trova in tutte le librerie più bobe di Trieste e FVG e online qua e che xe el regalo de Nadal più bel del mondo (bon, reclam finida :D ), ecco in anteprima i risultati dello studio sui Vecioni de Trieste!

P.s. Ovviamente lo studio non riguarda tutti i veci, che mediamente xe cocoli (paracool advisory!), ma solo the dark side of the vecionis: the ranzid vecionis, the bavose vecionis, the vecia marantigas or even worst the scontrosa grazia vecionis.


VECIONI, SE LI CONOSCI LI EVITI. SE LI CONOSCI, NO I TE MANDA A REMENGO

Results
In figure time budget you can see the time budget of the ranzid, bavose and scontrosa grazia vecionis. Time budget is a highly professional term traducibile in triestin with “cossa casso i fa”.



Impetessing
This is one of the favourite passatemp of the vecionis, performed in particular where they can drink very traditional vinazza or bevanda and not monade moderne like spritz aperol, mohiti and other stupidezzs.

Fig. Coso. The ex sindac Cosoleenee performing
a perfect mandriolaschening.
Mandriolaschening
It consists in watching the cantiers brontolanding and porconanding to the lavorators that no se fa cussì and that fazevo meio mi and that una volta iera meo. Solitament this behavior is performed with the traditional posture called “la classica”, i.e. con le man drio la schena (fig. Coso).

Talianing
It consists in speaking to young muleti, mocolosi and cagainbraghe trying to use the italian language. Obviously they will vocalize obrobriety like “occhio al plocchio” or “non bevere che ti va per tresso” or “passami il cucchiaro e il pirone” or “dopo andiamo in osmicchia a bere uno spricchio”.

Scataracing
Emission of spudoni on the road frequently preceduted by heavy sounds of muco snorting, cataro growling or mocol sniffing.

Capel driving
Performed tipicament in an old Ford Fiesta. The vecion will drive it using only the first gear, with a capel in the head, sfrizionanding a casinazz and remenghing all the other road users, like auti-che-cori-come-mone, motorete-che-fa-zig-zag, bici-che-trieste-no-xe-per-bici and pedoni-che-no-i-ga-una-casa?

Cotecing
Playing cotecio, but also gnagning, briscoling and treseting, with integrated porconing for each card butated in tola.

Mulete sardoning
The real vecio bavoso follow a complicated algorithm that oblige him to sardonate only muletes of an age estimated with the formula:

Età muleta da sardonar = Età vecio bavoso/3 + 16 - Età vecio bavoso/3 + remengo random number.

Nosepoling
Consists in the emission of the sacre formula “nosepol” to every new (or old) propost. Variation can be “nosegamaifato” or the most powerful “nogascopo”.

Pedocining
Performed primarily by female vecia marantigas, it consists in going to the sea at the Pedocin remenghing all the other vecia marantigas that permit themselves to put their sugaman 1 cm inside their habitual space.

Ruksac remenghing
Morning behavior performed in the coriere of about 7.40 a.m. or 1 p.m., caused by the ruksacs of the muletis that break the marones if tegnuted on their shoulders and break the marones istess if tegnuted on the ground, because the ranzid vecionis could tolate themselves.

Scaio intanfanding
Strictly correlated to ruksac remenghing, this behavior is performed primariament on the coriere, but all day long. You can nasar sudaded scaions or eau de varechina scaions or the evil teero de naftalina scaion.

Clanfe remenghing
Performed in summer when young clanfadores schizz apositament the vecionis at the Topolini, rovinanding the messainpiega of the vecia marantigas.

Gataring
Typical behavior of vecia marantigas, that give food and cocoles to selvadigos cats. This behavior evolved also in cocalaring, cinghialaring and cornaciaring.

Inconsapevol autoironing
The real ranzid vecion doesn’t think to be a vecion. So, all the vitzs and batudones on the vecionis will make him laugh a lot. A typical expression of a 90 years old ranzid inconsapevol vecion is: “Ciò, iera quel mona de vecio insempià... 70 ani el ga, coss’te vol far...”.

Opalà! Per saver el resto del studio e sopratuto come sopraviver ve toca comprar el libro :P
Opur andè de sconton in libreria, butè un cuc dentro e dopo scampè. Comportamento catalogato come: istrianing or sbafo reading :D






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